Rachel Carney

Rachel Carney

Ongoing Negotiation

Whenever I walk in a London Street,

I’m ever so careful to watch my feet

  A.A. Milne

but if / you follow every / path in loose / fatigue then / every crack between / each stone / will surge / up to confront to / trip you up to / trick you / with a chronic / wink

a / white rabbit with / a ticking pocket / watch a hat / but then you’ll click / the finger

thumb / but pull the / hip the shot / of it will / hover / on the brink as / if an ankle shivered / in the phantom of / a six-year-old / to want / to click it slow / the poet / back again / you’re gone to earth but / not and then / the bones / of you will lumber

/ on / and on and / on and on / and on / as time forgot

fatigue / there is / an art to it

to rush is / an illusion / a soft blur / swirls / through crowds / pours up / escalators / down stairs / no / need / just drift / next tube / tube in / 2 minutes / might go / I    think / before / before I get / on board / and that’s / drift / just how it / it is / pigeon nods / pecks / crumbs / under the bench / and that’s / ok / just wait / ignore this / rush / next tube / tube in 4 / minutes / have to / sit / sit / down now / I have / have learned / I had / to learn / to let / go / drift / to rush is / an / illusion / time is

Rachel Carney is a poet, creative writing tutor and academic based in Cardiff. Her debut poetry collection, Octopus Mind, explores themes of perception, creativity, and neurodiversity, and was selected as one of The Guardian’s Best Poetry Books of 2023.

Rachel wrote this about these poems:

As we grow up, childhood memories, stories and poems become entangled with the way our bodies interact with the world. I have been seeking new methods through which to explore the impact of neurodivergent experience or chronic illness on my own experience of time: through interruption, disruption, or the unwanted expansion of space. These poems were intended to evoke two very different experiences in very different locations, but they both seem to circle around that sense of altered or disrupted time.